i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize