Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
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i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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