Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i think i have two assholes
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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