there's paper in my vomit.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize