...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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