i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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