1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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