haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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