Your dad touched me again.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize