You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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