We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
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We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
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One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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