I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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