Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I smell like Dick and happiness
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize