she was so not down for the gang bang
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize