we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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