my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize