I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize