Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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