yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize