just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Randomize