i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
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THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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