white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize