addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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