hotel room ftw
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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