What did we do last night that was yellow?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize