no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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