Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so let's talk penis.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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