As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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