I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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