Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
a search helicopter?!
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
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i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
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My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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