You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I need to align my fucking chakras
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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