You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize