i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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