I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
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i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
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My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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