Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize