i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
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I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
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What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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