so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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