please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
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