we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize