I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
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so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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