I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize