Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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