how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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