May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize