Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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