Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
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