i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize