Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
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Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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