Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize