I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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